


My Immoral (My Immortal Parody)

by Niccolò Machiavelli (Piccolo_Machiavelli)



Category: 15th Century CE RPF, 16th Century CE RPF, Assassin's Creed - All Media Types, Historical RPF, Machiavelli - Fandom
Genre: Assassin's Creed II, Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, Gen, History
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-04
Updated: 2017-01-04
Packaged: 2018-09-14 17:45:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9196607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Piccolo_Machiavelli/pseuds/Niccol%C3%B2%20Machiavelli
Summary: Machiavelli turns into a "dprezzing goffik" in what is possibly the greatest mockery of him known to existence.





	

Chapter 1.

AN: Special francs (geddit because he went 2 france for a mission) 2 my bf (ew, not in that way) nic, 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Machie ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! FOB ROX!

Hi my name is Niccolò di Bernardo dei Machiavelli and my grandpa’s name is Niccolò (that’s how I got my name). I have short oak brown hair with soft tips that is straight and reaches my mid-neck and hazel brown eyes like forest trees and a lot of people tell me I look like a mouse (AN: if u don’t know what that is then get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to Ezio Auditore but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I like to eat but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I’m also a diplomat, and I work at a job called the Second Chancery where I’m in my first year (I’m twenty-nine). I’m a Renaissance man (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly robes. I love the markets and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a poofy red shirt with matching white lace around it and a black and yellow overcoat, orangeish pantaloons and tall black boots. I was wearing my belt, sword, dagger and pistol. I was walking outside the Chancery. It was storming and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of Templars stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

“Hey Niccolò!” shouted a voice. I looked up. It was… Ezio Auditore da Firenze!

“What’s up Ezio?” I asked.

“Nothing.” he said shyly. 

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.

AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me francs!

 

 

Chapter 2.

AN: Francs 2 molly 4 helpin me wif da idea! BTW templars stop flaming ma story ok!

The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was storming and raining again. I opened the door to the bathroom and drank some wine from a bottle I had. My bathroom was red scarlet and inside it was a hot pink toilet with black lace on the ends. I got out of the bathroom and took off my giant toga which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a black satin robe with red sleeves, a silver ring, short boots, and black tights on. I put on four pairs of throwing daggers on my belt, and put a crown on my head.

My friend, Leonardo (AN: Nic dis is u!) woke up then and grinned at me. He flipped his long shoulder-length dirty blonde hair with brown streaks and opened his sky-blue eyes. He put on his blue tunic with a red cape, black tights, and pointy high-rise boots. We put on our weapons (concealable blades small pistols and sharp swords.)

“OMFG, I saw you talking to Ezio Auditore da Firenze yesterday!” he said excitedly.

“Yeah? So?” I said, blushing.

“Do you like Ezio?” he asked as we went out of the house and into the streets.

“No I so fucking don’t!” I shouted.

“Yeah right!” he exclaimed. Just then, Ezio walked up to me.

“Hi.” he said.

“Hi.” I replied flirtily.

“Guess what.” he said.

“What?” I asked.

“Well, the minstrels are having a concert in the town square.” he told me.

“Oh. My. Fucking. God!” I screamed. I love the minstrels. They’re my favorite band, besides the flute players.

“Well…. do you want to go with me?” he asked.

I gasped.


End file.
